Millions of Australians woke up this morning to the catastrophic news that #instagram was down.
By using a range of quasi-legal legacy technologies, I’ve pieced together updates on the issues #Insta users are fretting over. As a public service, I’m happy to share this with you now.
You’re welcome.
At a glance…
@RealManAntFanBro2008 has informed all the women in the world that unless they are #blonde, #subservient and #8orbetter, he’s unlikely to move out and start a relationship with them. Meanwhile in the next room, @SoccerMumWithAttitude5 would like @RealManAntFanBro2008 to know that she didn’t sit through three years of #GenderStudies at #USyd to cop half-arsed #incel #bullshit from such a ungrateful little twat.
@SmokingSongstrees26 is feeling #grateful and #blessed. The Contiki Tour has one more day in #Cancún #drinks #sunset #yolo #party #tequilla before heading inland to experience the #spiritiual and #ancient #wisdomoftheIncas
@FoxyBoi45 is feeling #pumped for #legday and has again supplied a shirtless photograph of himself holding his tummy in.
@GoBigOrGoHome9 is feeling #SickAF in the blurry aftermath of #schooners #shots and #cheekynosebeers at the #footy. He’s kindly supplied a picture of he and #oldmate @BekytheBagLady67 sensibly deciding not to drive home.
@MargoFromMargreting says ‘Hey, guys’ and is happy to share more information about the exclusive new face powder / weight loss tea / dream catcher / crypto she is being paid to promote, but only because, *everyone is asking about it.
*No one, ever.
@EatPrayLaughBoneAHemsworth56 is one of many #wellnesswarriors nailing #downwardfacingdogs on the beach this morning. She is feeling #blessed and #grateful to be living her #bestlife while acknowledging and owning her own #privilege #namaste
#CrazyKatDude99 has posted yet another image of #LazyCatMinx slaying. #IKR #catslife #lol #themfeels #cryforhelp
#gold #bittooclosetothetruth